now what?

Four

it's time . . .i have been so lost, been so confused about what awaits me; hurting from the wounds of all my failures; and hurting from the most glaring rejection: hers.

it's time to head off into solitude and collect the shards of whatever remains of my heart and attempt to put it back together. i may find not much of it is left, but i have to see; and that is why i must go off into the wilderness.

i need to get separation from things which remind me of her and of my failures. i will be gone a while, who knows how long?

i need to find out what is lurking deep down in my soul; what am i made of?

so long, for now _ but not forever.